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| Appiness | Arcadia Flynn | |||
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During a long distance phone call to a friend in South america, the subject of men, relationships and love arose. My friend said (in her thick accent) "Don't worry darlink...all you need is 'appiness" I think this is what she meant…. |
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| Are You Talking To Me? | Pat Cannard | |||
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She took a deep breath as she paused in her stride, Her lips slowly parted, her eyes opened wide. |
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| A Seasonal Request | Steve Morris | |||
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A middle aged, sad bloke writes a letter to Santa in the hope a having a buxom lass delivered down the chimney! Note: This poem was created in Lancashire - UK (It helps if you imagine the accent!) |
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| A Salty Dilemma | Gideon Werds | |||
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You can't blame all of Mary's problems on an 'innocent' little lamb. |
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| Bedtime Prayer | Author Unknown | |||
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Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray for a man who's not a creep. One who's handsome, smart and strong. Who's not afraid to admit when he is wrong... |
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| Dear Santa | Robyn Scott | |||
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All I want for Christmas is a pair of nice young men, A football team . League or Union . I don't mind, ... |
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Estranged | Robyn Scott | ||
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I accept that I'm abnormal, That is ... different from the rest, Unlike most other robots, I put normality to the test, Being born a female,... |
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Feminine Environs | Juliana Taliaferro | ||
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While ruffles and lace certainly have their place... |
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Giving
Her the Eye 
(Ex Top Ten) |
Barney Egan | |||
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A beauty stood on a balcony high, Sneezed and lost her blue glass eye. A young man walking down The Strand Caught the flashing eye-ball one hand.... |
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| I
Am Just A Normal Guy But...
(Ex Top Ten) |
(Woody) Meltcher | |||
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Here is a weird funny song I wrote a while ago, and to this day cannot put it to music - that makes it a poem. |
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| If I had a Rich Man | Robyn Scott | |||
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If I had a rich man, Deiger deiger deidle deiger deidle deiger diedle dum, All day long I'd sit upon my bum, If I had a wealthy man … I … wouldn't have to work hard, ... |
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| I'm Pissed Off! | Gay Liddington | |||
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I'm pissed off about GST and having to pee in the middle of the night... |
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| Internet Men | Howie | |||
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I wrote this when my sister complained that she was fed up with being single. She happened to mention that she'd joined an internet dating agency... |
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| It's Time | Arcadia Flynn | |||
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I'm thirty six and single Children? not a one "Half your luck"...I hear you say, "I'll bet you're having fun!" ... |
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| Lake Elisa | Don Johnson | |||
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One of the strange people I met...... |
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| Love Came Cautiously | S. Sorrensen | |||
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like, at first, I tried not to notice her she was lovely, lovable, loved everybody loved her I didn't want to notice her .... |
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| Mayor McCheese | Nykki Houtkooper | |||
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Have you had that one night stand from hell? The one that you didn't notch on your belt out of shame and sheer embarrassment? Here's the play-by-play of the night that will cause you to remember EVERYTHING all over again! |
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| Out Of The Woodwork | Sophie Jean | |||
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I have always threatened that it was dangerous to go out with a poet - and this proves that danger lies in the immortality of an attempt to pick one up! |
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| Panties
(Ex Top Ten)
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Roger Wooller | |||
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She wanted embroidered on pants and her bra a message that told him that he'd gone too far.... |
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| Pasta and Dates | Anita Cates | |||
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Trying to impress on a first date? Do not try this. |
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| Phone Games | BarBaRa (The Essesce) Brickland | |||
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.You know what it's like? you're home alone..You have this..um..urge..to..Well, you call her, and she's happy...she's very happy to hear your voice. |
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| Private
Play
(Ex Top Ten) |
Alan Corkish | |||
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When I was a little boy Snuggled safe in bed They said I should play with my soldiers.. |
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| Puppy Love | Brian Bell | |||
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Dolores had been on her own for a while, since Herbie had cashed in his chips. Just lately, a friend gave Dolores a pup, returning a smile to her lips.... |
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| Scotland
(Ex Top Ten)
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Arcadia Flynn | |||
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I want to go to Scotland I want to find a man with hairy legs and chest and face no blond, blue eyes and tan with muscles on his muscles a strapping kind of lad with kilt and great big sporran that would make me glad! .... |
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| She Stole My Heart | Wally (The Bear) Finch | |||
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I saw her in a crowded bar I worshipped her from afar Her rose tattoo with a star... |
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| Someone | Robyn Scott | |||
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Oh Hell! … I'm starting to think like a man, I'm considering the prospect of getting a wife, A someone to do all of those things, Mundane or trivial in my life,.... |
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| Sweet Success | Robyn Scott | |||
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I'm in the market for a Sugar Daddy, A geriatric with silver grey hair, A prosperous respectable senior citizen, A charming sweet man … to escort me everywhere,.... |
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| Teaser | Sophie Jean | |||
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Hey! You! Yeah, you with that "I've got nearly enough on my plate but I'd like a serving of you dressed in nothing more than massage oil" look in your eyes..... |
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| The Answers In Your Coffee | Jacqueline H Bridle | |||
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I've been to marriage guidance counsellors, I've had my tarot read, Observed the books on love and sex, and done all what they said. .... |
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| The Blind Date | Gay Liddington | |||
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Who said old ladies were past it? |
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| The Lost Chance | James Tamarac | |||
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It took me three weeks to build up the steam. To speak to the woman I see in my dreams. She's beautiful, humorous, smart, caring. And every day I catch myself staring. |
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| The Perfect Man | Alota Fagina | |||
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I thought of this poem after I made a COMPLETE fool of myself, flirting with someone who wasn't intersted in me---or even my sex!! |
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| When Audrey met Henry | Wes | |||
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Audrey was a spinster with a 'man hunt' on her mind. She'd set her eyes on Henry, just moved in the flat behind...... |
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All
poetry is copyright by the individual authors.
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